so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
