yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Michael Bay diarrhea
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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