You work out of a Hotel?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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