I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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