Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
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