You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Randomize
