mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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