She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
