i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
