just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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