Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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