i was born a porn star she said
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
