I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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