it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
