Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize