We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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