Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize