You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
