What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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