she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
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A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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