She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
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