just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I deserve to be covered in dicks
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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