So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
