If i come over, it means nothing
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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