we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
