either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Randomize
