i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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