I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
