i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
