North Korea, Best Korea!
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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