yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
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