She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
