there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize