I only kidnapped one of them. chill
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize