Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
you win again, gameday.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm getting married
To pizza
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
