It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize