Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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