Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
