Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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