we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
