holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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