no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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