you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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