Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
