After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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