While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
