Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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