Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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