she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
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