At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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